What words do you often say to your child – “can”
or “not”? Both are extremely important for young children: “can”
instills confidence in one’s own abilities and fosters confidence in
the world around it, but “not allowed” sets the framework for what is permitted and
gives a sense of security. Let’s talk about when actually
you need to establish strict prohibitions, and when you can allow the baby
do what he wants.
10 things not to forbid children
Of course, raising children is not complete without a moderate number.
prohibitions required for physical and emotional security.
However, psychologists say that there are ten things
which should not be forbidden to the baby.
- Dress, eat and drink on your own
Of course, you will do it better, better and faster.
child, but hardly help his development. Children’s specialists
Generally consider independent buttoning and tensioning
gloves are one of the best exercises to improve motility
fingers and, therefore, for brain development.
Allocate more time to fees so that the child can
have breakfast or dress yourself – at your own pace, slowly and not
fussing Of course, if you are afraid of being late, you can say:
�“I’m sure you can handle the clothes yourself, but we need to hurry.
Let me help you now, and in the evening you can wear
pajamas. And the ability to use a spoon or mug is useful in
kindergarten, if only you do not want to shove lunch at school
brought up by you as a “clumsy”.
- To help parents
How often can you hear from indignant mommies: “My son in general
doesn’t want to do anything at home! ”But for some reason they forget how
a few years earlier he had been protected and expensive items from
interactions: “Do not touch or you will break!”, “Put in place,
you will break! “Adults are afraid that they will have to
redo, but he needs to feel his own
importance and need and hear parental approval. Ask (not
require) a child to help you with household chores, allow
perform simple tasks and do not forget to thank for
- To be active
When a kid makes noise, runs, jumps and fools, he really
physically developing and relaxing, splashing out the accumulated
energy Of course, this behavior is not welcome.
public places (clinic, store), but at home you can
allow him to be what he is. Maybe you should
join and fool around with him?
Some mothers forbid children to climb horizontal bars, preferring
quiet romp in the sandbox. Yes, it’s easier for them to ban than to show how
climb and descend, control your body. Allow
active exercises, securing if necessary.
- Sleep with light
Fear of darkness is a natural fear for children of four or five,
who at this age are separated psychologically from the mother. Fee
for such autonomy is the occurrence of nightmares in
child, in which profit is closely intertwined with fiction and fantasy.
Dim nightlight calms the baby when he wakes up and helps
make sure there are no scary monsters around. True, there is
the view that light disturbs the natural flow of sleep, so enter
lighting as a temporary measure.
- Get dirty
Do not be afraid that the child gets dirty by picking up a brush with
paints or markers. Get special non-toxic
paint, spread an oilcloth on the floor or table, equip the baby
an apron – let him draw.
Allow также заниматься исследовательской деятельностью на
walks. Let the child tumble in the grass, measure the depth of the puddle,
throws up armfuls of autumn leaves, not worrying about
soiled clothes. In the end, you probably have a washing
- Explore items
Let the children understand the purpose and structure of the most diverse
items. You’d be surprised, but many child development specialists
It is recommended to say to the baby: “Touch the things. Squeeze, shift out
one hand to another, pull, open, knock, think and tear! ”
An exclusive toy is sometimes less attractive to a child than
a pile of old newspapers or a box with buttons. If you are afraid for
expensive dishes or valuable trinket, keep it away from tenacious
and inquisitive pens. Or try to consider it together,
explaining why this thing is so dear to you and that it is better to find another
subject for games.
- To watch cartoons
Yes, we have already said that the quality of modern cartoons is sometimes
does not hold water, and developmental programs are wrong
useful as is commonly believed. However, it’s important for current children to be
course popular cartoons to discuss them with their peers.
Pick up those programs and animations that you find useful.
Be sure to watch them with your baby, discuss controversial
moments and give examples of acceptable behavior.
- Leave food on a plate
Do not force the child to leave clean plates on the table. Reception
food must be pleasure, not medieval torture.
First, about the serving size and the number of dishes is always possible
argue Yes, and nutritionists are concerned about the rapidly growing number
little fat men. Secondly, do not distract children with cartoons,
cram as many spoons of wholesome porridge as possible with cunning. Real
the benefit will appear when the child feels the taste of food, begins to chew
slowly, will consider lunch a pleasant ritual.
- To dream
Fiction is a natural interlacing of fantasy and
reality. Help your child distinguish fantasy from intentional
cheating. Tell him that his story is very similar to a fairy tale,
Ask to think of something else like that. Try to exercise
genuine interest in his fantasies, thereby encouraging the development
- Give personal opinion
Try to take into account children’s interests, desires and opinions.
Argue your decisions, not dismissing the phrases “Because I
so decided! ”or“ Dad and I know better how to do it! ”Not
Try also to paint his time by the minute. Maybe he just
wants to come up with his own game, not just sitting in a corner,
We also read: Как запрещать ребенку не
5 things that must be prohibited
And yet the word “no” should not completely disappear from your
educational dictionary. However, it is only necessary to prohibit
exceptional cases regarding child safety. And you
a ban must imply its absolute fulfillment. let’s
We learn that you should definitely prohibit your child.
- Beat others
Sometimes babies do not know how to express their own emotions in words,
applying blows and bites to parents, peers and home
animals. Do not allow to start a fight with children, stop
child if he hits you or mistreats you
a kitten. Stop the kid’s hand, say, looking into his eyes:
�”You can not fight and beat others.”
- Take someone else’s
Explain to the children that you cannot dispose of things that
they do not belong. It is unacceptable to select someone else’s toys, spoil
someone else’s clothes, take unpaid goods from the store, etc. If
the little one brought from the kindergarten not his toy, ask him to return
- Be rude
Introduce the children with polite words, the concept of morality and
rules of decency. On a personal example, show what you need
greet, apologize, give thanks, but cannot be foul
spitting, being rude to elders.
- Break the “safety technique”
Learn the rules of safe behavior for kids with
pictures or cartoons. It is very accessible and clearly described that
you absolutely can’t play on the road, stick your fingers in the sockets,
climb on the windowsill and messing with matches. It is categorical,
- Talk to strangers
Do not intimidate the baby, but be sure to discuss this “no”
in detail. Denote the so-called “circle of trust”, in which
include your friends, housemates, parents in kindergarten.
Play situations: for example, what to do if you are unfamiliar
uncle will call to see a kitten?
Too many restrictions are the main reason why
the child stops responding to the parental words. If their
too much, then you risk raising a “comfortable” baby.
Set categorical restrictions, coordinate them with all
households and do not be afraid to change them when the child grows up.
We also read:
- Parental injunctions – benefit and harm: consultation of a psychologist
- Unnecessary bans: how we ruin the lives of our children
- How to tell a child “NOT”
- 5 alternatives to tell the child “NO”