Hello! Для любого baby семья – это его
a small world where he takes his first steps, knows the world, learns and
develops. ATсе, что малыш здесь слышит и наблюдает, формирует его
ideas about the world. Therefore, the internal microclimate in
family is extremely important for the child to grow up physically and
mentally healthy. From the relationship between mom and dad, he scoops
behavioral model that carries in his adult
The content of the article
- 1 Why is the atmosphere in the family where the child grows important?
- 1.1 How family scandals affect the baby
- 2 How to behave parents if conflict is brewing
- 2.1 What to do if the scandal took place, and in front of
- 2.1 What to do if the scandal took place, and in front of
- 3 Irina Mlodik – “Family scandals and a child”
- 4 Mother’s school: how family scandals affect the psyche
Why is the atmosphere in the family where the child grows important?
It is widely believed that a small child has nothing yet
understands ATот почему многие папы и мамы не стесняются закатывать
noisy scandals, which even sometimes develop into fights. ATзрослым
it seems that the kid, because of his age, will not understand anyway
meanings of many words, and in general will not understand properly
In this case, very few people come to mind that a child
like a sponge, absorbs negative emotions, parental intonation,
манеру поведения, и в будущем начнет им
Sometimes in kindergarten kids involuntarily act out dramas,
who spied in his family. The little one takes the doll and plays, and
then suddenly she starts scolding her. AT этот момент как раз становится
you can see and hear everything that the child learned at home from their parents.
He screams at the poor doll, calls her name, hits her. Only an experienced teacher,
watching this picture will be able to understand in what a terrible atmosphere
stress and conflict grows a little man. After that he
of course, try to discuss the situation with the parents, but such
insightful educators are few.
How family scandals affect the baby
Permanent family dramas have a negative effect on
здоровье baby и в результате провоцируют серьезные
- Психологические расстройства у детей – это
the most common consequence of constant conflict in the family.
Such problems manifest themselves in different ways. Someone from kids can
become an evil and aggressive fighter who constantly contrives quarrels with
peers. Другие дети замыкаются в себе, неохотно идут на
contact, avoid communication with anyone. ATсе это ухудшает психическое
health, and over time begins to adversely affect
emerging character in general. If nothing is done,
старшем возрасте у baby появятся огромные проблемы.
- Физические расстройства чаще всего проявляются
speech impairment and visual impairment. Living under constant stress
the kids start talking late. Have них также часто наблюдаются
speech defects, stuttering. Vision problems are often expressed in
that it becomes difficult for a child to focus on a specific
subject. The fact is that chronic stress affects the cortex.
brain, resulting in and deteriorates physical
health, development of the baby is delayed.
Some scandals kids take so close to their hearts that they
deposited deep in the memory and become almost
the only childhood memories. ATзрослые после разрешения
conflict able to pull themselves together so they forget
unpleasant episodes. But it’s hard for children to understand what happened
scandal, and they begin to blame themselves in the discord in the family. So u
baby появляются навязчивые мысли о том, что он мешает маме и
Dad, that he does not like, he is all alone. Feeling your own
uselessness later develops into a large number
We read также:
- 12 simple ways to show your child your love each
- 25 советов как воспитать baby в любви и спокойствии
Very bad scandals affect the child
before bedtime. Because of fright and stress, the baby cannot fall asleep, therefore
does not get enough sleep, but in the morning feels sluggish and upset.
ATсе родители должны понять, что выяснения отношений на
глазах у baby приводит к серьезным и необратимым последствиям.
Next I will give you some tips on how to avoid conflict. it
will minimize the harm to the baby.
How to behave to parents if a conflict is brewing
In my opinion, every adult is the first thing
I have to learn – to keep silent in time. it сложно сделать,
when emotions hit the edge. ATсе же важно задуматься о возможных
the consequences of a quarrel and that the lost nerve cells are not
will recover. Try to be distracted – for example, count up to 100.
or perform breathing exercises.
ATторое правило – сделать паузу, чтобы
the beginning quarrel did not turn into a real scandal with shouts and
smashing dishes. Leave the conflict zone: retire to another
go to the room to get some air
opportunity to ponder the situation in a relaxed atmosphere. Not only
walk away pointedly, slamming the door and rolling your eyes. It is better
just say that you need to cool down a bit, and then you are ready
will continue the conversation.
The third rule – learn to control your language,
watch what you say. The most serious conflicts
often begin with unimportant trivialities that take turns
reproaches for past mistakes: one of you is late a couple of months ago
returned home, forgot to take out the trash, another poured a laptop with coffee,
spent rationally general money. Why stir up a conflict yet
stronger? After all, we are talking about what has already been passed. Learn to forget
past mistakes, do not reproach them each other, do not go on
personality. Insults are deep in memory not only of children,
but also adults.
You can also try to change the topic of conversation and discuss something
more enjoyable. After this and returning to the subject of the quarrel will be
Of course, in family life, everything is not perfect,
so scandals happen to everyone. Only I am sure that in our
forces to weaken the conflict, so as not to rake it later
What to do if the scandal took place, and in front of
If the baby saw his parents quarreling, with him necessarily
need to talk and discuss this situation. Explain crumbs understandable
his tongue, because of what a scandal erupted. Try to convince him
that the conflict has been settled, and this will never happen again.
Do not forget to add that all the hurtful words spoken were a mistake,
and in fact mom and dad are kind and good and love each
Make peace between yourself. The main thing that the baby saw that
все наладилось и родители снова нормально общаются друг с
a friend. Только вот делать вид, что вы миритесь, ради baby не
worth it (i.e. it is not necessary to arrange a “performance of a truce” for your
только для baby). Kids feel keenly false and
Show the crumbs your love. Hug and kiss your child
tell me how much you love him. A child needs to know and feel,
that in his family all love each other.
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show the children that you love them
If you quarrel in such a way that it comes to fights, you should seriously
think about it. At least discuss with your spouse in a relaxed atmosphere.
what’s going on between you. You can also resort to help
family psychotherapist. Remember that children from a young age silently
watch all the family dramas. They can’t answer and even just
leave the conflict zone. It happens year after year, and for kids it is
things are becoming the norm. In the future, the same model
relationship they will transfer to their families.
If a boy constantly watches his father beat his mom,
adulthood, he simply will not be able to treat women well.
The norm for him would be to resolve any conflicts with his wife’s fists. Have
него не будет уважения к собственной матери, а, значит, и ко
all other women.
For a girl growing up in such a family, the model will become the norm.
mother’s behavior. When she grows up, she will not respect herself,
will take on the role of the victim, will constantly walk in bruises from
beatings and for her it will be a normal lifestyle. After all this
model of the family in which she lived and which became for her
Unfortunately, full families are not always healthy. Rather, I’m about
that family relationships must be harmonious. Important,
that the child was brought up in love and happiness, and the house was his
a fortress in which he feels protected. AT
families with the opposite situation, children becoming teenagers, often
they run away from home because they are not comfortable there.
Even if the family broke up, this is not a reason to give up. To each
of us can build new relationships. Only when choosing
Future spouse do not forget about the child. Difficulties
trap us everywhere, but with the right approach you can create
harmonious family for your child.
I want to focus on the fact that since birth
the child is a person, he has rights not only to food,
roof over your head, clothes, training, but also on mental health.
The baby should be brought up in love and harmony from the first days of his
of life. If something in your family isn’t perfect, work on it.
ATедь любая ссора, которая происходит на глазах у baby,
It is deposited with a heavy load in his memory and leads to complexes,
проблемам со здоровьем во взрослой of life. If you feel that
conflict is inevitable, try to explain to the kid what is happening,
only very delicate, so as not to harm his psyche.
Conflicts happen in all families. This is normal, from
domestic turmoil can not go anywhere. Only one can on time
keep quiet, calmly discuss everything and smooth the conflict, while others
they only inflame passions and petty quarrels inflate into stormy scandal. I
I am sure that the family still needs to be built on the love and respect of each other
to friend. Therefore, learn to resolve disputes peacefully, to respect yourself
And most importantly: remember that your child is your reflection, you
для него главный пример в of life. So start with yourself and
меняйтесь в лучшую сторону, чтобы стать для baby достойным
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в семье: влияние на baby
Irina Mlodik – “Family scandals and a child”