How to raise children: whip orgingerbread?

Being born into the world, man is a pure
sheet. The task of parents is to ensure the safety of the baby, to instill
him moral norms and values, create conditions for full
personal development. it сделать непросто. After all по мере взросления
the child begins to show their own individuality, defends
his opinion, sometimes naughty and indulge. One of the most famous and
ancient parenting methods resorted to by parents – method
carrot and stick, or encouragement and punishment. How much he
is effective?

The content of the article

  • 1 whip method
  • 2 Gingerbread Method
  • 3 Reasonable combination of rewards and punishments
    • 3.1 Как наказывать baby: правила для родителей
    • 3.2 How to encourage the child correctly: recommendations to parents
  • 4 Carrot and stick: on punishment and praise in the process of education

кнут и пряник

Whip method

Whip method заключается в физическом воздействии на baby с
aim to punish offense. Many parents can slap
baby, отвесить подзатыльник, поставить в угол и даже стегнуть
belt. The purpose of such action is one – to hurt, show your
power over the baby, put in place.

Theoretically, this method can be quite effective.
Perhaps the child will end negative behavior for fear of pain,
bans and hardships. However, approved child behavior may
show only in the presence of mom or dad.

Physical punishments have a destructive effect on the psyche.
little man. They undermine the credibility of parents, form
fear and resentment on adults. Children who are systematically punished
�“Whip”, become closed, shy, depressed,
learn to lie and dodge.

Upon reaching adolescence, these guys can
�“Rebel” and show negativity towards adults. Thats
there is to deny the norms of behavior adopted in society to proclaim
own anti-values ​​and follow them.

Read on:

  • Почему нельзя шлепать baby — 6 причин
  • Бить или не бить baby – последствия физического
    punishment of children
  • Нужно ли наказывать baby в 3 года: мнение родителей
    and psychologist


Gingerbread Method

Gingerbread Method заключается в обязательном поощрении baby за
desired behavior, help, assignment. Promotions
necessary in the process of education, but with them you also need to be
prudent. There is a danger to teach the kid that for any
a positive action awaits his reward.

В вопросе поощрений baby важно различать две формы желаемого
behavior. The first is when a baby succeeds in its
activities. For example, a year and a half child learned to collect
pyramid Or the student solved the difficult problem on his own. In these
cases, the child himself is happy with his achievement, a sense of success
is for him an internal, automatic promotion.

A little man needs sincere joy at such moments,
love, empathy of parents. If a взрослые за правильно
the solved problem will be given a coin, they can pay off the internal
satisfaction, replacing it with the expectation of reward from outside.

Вторая форма поведения, за которую baby нужно обязательно
поощрить – нравственное поведение, it ожидаемый родителями и
socially approved course of action, especially in critical
situations. After all ребенок не рождается с нормами морали, привить их –
and there is the task of the educator.

We also read: как правильно поощрять

Чрезмерное поощрение baby наносит вред становлению его
personality. When parents indulge too much, indulge in whims,
strenuously take care of the offspring, it can grow selfish,
избалованным (12 признаков избалованного baby), инфантильным
a man who is not able to decide his life
the difficulties.


Reasonable combination of rewards and punishments

So what to do? How to raise a baby, so as not to break it
psyche penalties and not spoil the excessive rewards? Answer
One: find a middle ground, it is reasonable to combine both. AND
Be sure to take into account the individual characteristics of the peanut: the approach to
tomboy-shalunishke and a closed dreamer will be different.

Как наказывать baby: правила для родителей

  • Clearly define the boundaries of what is permitted.
    Tell your baby what is good behavior for you and what to do.
    can not. Speak that bad behavior is punished and
    make it clear what is waiting for him if he does not obey;
  • Follow the sequence. «Not» всегда
    must mean no. The child should know that if he breaks
    prohibition, he will definitely have to wait for a specific punishment. Not
    allow the charge for offense to depend on your mood
    parents or other circumstances;
  • Be united in your requirements. Thats есть мама
    and dad, and preferably grandparents should act alone
    front (friendly family will roll up the mountain, or how to overcome disagreements
    in raising a child). Children quickly understand from whom you can twist
    ropes, and begin to manipulate adults (small
    manipulators: how to respond to the tricks of the child? 10 most
    successful children’s phrases);
  • Punish accordingly misdemeanor. First
    perfect misconduct or small prank worthy only
    warnings, whereas intentional misconduct or
    aggression deserves serious punishment (to punish or not
    child for random misconduct?);
  • Сохраняйте спокойствие. Punishing, do not cry,
    and try to calmly explain to the child what exactly he did not
    so, and what behavior do you expect from him in the future. Appeal
    attention that you do not like exactly the act, and toddler you are very
    love and grieve when you have to deprive him of something;
  • Never undertake educational influences in
    bad mood.

We also read: 8 лояльных способов
punish children. How to punish a child for disobedience

Have you often wondered how to punish correctly?
your child after his pranks and disobedience? Do you listen to
How did your parents act in such cases? Is it fair
punished you as a child, and how to punish your own
children, in order not to injure their psyche, psychologist Julia will tell

How to encourage the child correctly: recommendations to parents

  • Хвалите baby за конкретные поступки. It is better
    say “What is the order in the room! Look nice! “Than
    �”Well done!” About the cleaned toys;
  • Do not encourage natural things. If a
    scion himself took the bed behind him, washed the dishes, no need to say
    �“Good girl! You cleaned up after yourself! ” By this we demonstrate disbelief in
    child self-sufficiency;
  • Pay attention to positive emotions.
    , которые он испытал при достижении успеха. it
    help him analyze his feelings and try to continue
    to achieve goals;
  • Not используйте в качестве поощрения dayги.
    If a вам нравится идея материального вознаграждения, лучше выдавать
    buttons, coffee beans, etc. And for the agreed amount
    you can award a trip to the circus, on the rides, in the children’s center
    (children and money: 10 mistakes of financial education).

And do not forget that the most effective method is education
love When a child feels unconditional love and respect from
parents, punishment and encouragement will be perceived by them correctly and
fall on the fertile ground.

Total should be in moderation – and affection and rigor. Just many
parents can not stay on the “golden mean”, where there is no
places are neither pampered nor assisted.

We also read:

  • 25 tips on how to raise a child in love and peace
  • 12 simple ways to show your child your love each
  • Top of 10 mistakes of parents in raising children

Opinions from the forums:

fergie: Кнут на первых порах жизни baby
must be present necessarily. Up to five years not brought up, not
the child understood what is good and what is bad – consider
missed the moment. And if from childhood everything is laid in the head of a child, then
then you can build communication on only one “carrot”.

Лена: First слышу , что на первых порах
the life of the child whip must be present. He needs to explain with
the first days of life, talk to him, and not grab the whip. Not
Well of course it is necessary to scold, I do not argue, but the whip as for me this is the most
the last thing to be. If a вопросы будут решаться битьем
child, the farther, the harder the child grows up and you will be
just hate it.

Женя: Согласна с золотой серединой, хотя
to find her incredibly difficult. We must try to become a child friend and
authority to not be afraid to share with you, to listen, and
I understand that you are on his side. But he is also responsible for offenses.
should, and should understand it too.

Даша: If a постоянно ругать baby у него
there will be no incentive to do something well – why if it doesn’t care
scold, but at best, just do not notice? If a же постоянно
praise it will grow spoiled, not accepting criticism in his
address. It is necessary to combine 2 methods. The effect of this – scold, explain
for which they scolded – he will know that this is bad (not the first time
of course), did something even if something insignificant in your opinion –
sure to praise, he will have an incentive to do something not just
good, and better than last time ..

Берегите своих детей, ANDх за шалости не
Зло своих неудачных дней Никогда на них
do not tear.
Not сердитесь на них всерьез, Даже
если они провинились,
Ничего нет дороже слез, Что
from the cilia of the family rolled down.
If a валит усталость с
Совладать с нею нету мочи, Ну а к Вам
подойдет сынок
ANDли руки протянет дочка. Hug
покрепче их,
Детской ласкою дорожите it счастье?
короткий миг,
Быть счастливыми поспешите. After all
растают как снег весной,
Промелькнут дни златые эти
AND покинут очаг родной Повзрослевшие Ваши дети.
Перелистывая альбом С фотографиями детства, С
грустью вспомните о былом
О тех днях, когда были
Как же будете Вы хотеть В это время опять
Чтоб им маленьким песню спеть, Щечки
tender lips touch.
And while in the house the children’s laughter,
От игрушек некуда деться, Вы на свете счастливей
Берегите ж, пожалуйста, детство!

Carrot and stick: on punishment and praise in the process of education

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