To make a real man grow out of a little boy,
it is necessary to put a lot of effort into this. That boy
should grow up healthy and study well, in this case speech to go
will not be. It’s obvious. Talk about psychological
side of education, as well as pedagogical nuances and subtleties,
helping to shape true male
The content of the article
- 1 Some modern nuances of raising boys
- 1.1 How are boys different from girls?
- 2 How to educate a boy: the general rules
- 2.1 From general rules to specific rules
- 2.2 Features of education of the boy from birth to
- 3 Typical mistakes in raising a boy
- 4 Совет от Павла Ракова: Как из мальчика воспитать
a real man
Some modern nuances of raising boys
One of the most important conditions for raising a child (regardless
from whether it is a boy or a girl) – the presence of a nearby adult
person The kid tends to imitate an adult and take with
him an example. First of all, such an example for a boy should
be a man It is better if it is a father, but maybe an elder brother, and
grandfather, and uncle, and teacher, and even a complete stranger.
However, the problem is that nowadays more often
всего ребенка окружают не men, а преимущественно женщины.
Воспитатели в детском саду – женщины. Most school
teachers too. Children’s doctors are women again. Besides,
Many boys now grow up in single-parent families, and
in most cases – next to mom, not with dad.
But even if the family is full, it is not a fact that the boy will be
next to dad. Many fathers do not want to raise a son, believing that
Mom should do this. Other fathers by virtue of their
infantilism is incapable of fully rearing sons. Third
– loaded at work to such an extent that no matter what else they
Enough time and effort. Therefore willy-nilly to raise a son and
try to make him grow up a real man, have to mom.
How do boys differ from girls
This question is not as simple as it may seem. Until recently
time it was believed that in addition to the primary sexual characteristics, no
there are no other differences between newborn girls and boys.
However, recent studies have shown that this is far from the case.
Girls and boys since birth differ in many ways.
physiological and psychological signs. Thanks to these
featured from the very beginning of life boys and girls develop
Testosterone in the blood of boys is much more than that of girls.
But estrogen, on the contrary, more in girls. Differently boys
and girls running the brain. When девочка принимает какое-то решение
or does some kind of action, in this case both work for her
brain hemispheres. The boy is in exactly the same situation involved
just the right hemisphere.
Therefore, psychology and perception of the world in boys and girls
significantly different. Boys are much more likely to be adventurous.
situations. Besides, они чаще совершают аварии и преступления. By
for the same reason, there are three times more suicides among boys and
suicide attempts than girls.
And that’s not all congenital psychological
характеристики boys To properly raise a boy,
need to know:
- Due to the nervous system and hearing system
boys can’t stand high sounds for a long time. Low
tones are perceived by them much better. First of all, it is
Mom should be considered and try not to raise his voice to her son. When
мама кричит, ребенок думает не о смысле сказанных мамой слов,
and how best to protect him from her mother’s high voice;
- It is always important for boys how their activity is estimated. With
This assessment should be as specific as possible, decomposed “by
- The boy, unlike the girl, is much harder to comply
some stereotypes: rules of conduct, daily routine, adduction
yourself in order;
- Physical work is much easier for boys than
All this must try to take into account when educating
How to educate a boy: the general rules
For all the time of its existence, mankind has invented a lot
способов воспитания boys There is a Slavic, Cossack,
Spartan, German, Scandinavian ways – not all count.
Despite the difference in educational methods, all these methods
объединяет одно: сделать из мальчика a real man. Byговорим
more on this (of course, adjusted for the time in which
we are living).
First, let’s touch the general rules of education:
- It is very important when the baby has a sense of own
dignity. This forms independence in it. Of course when
this should be monitored so that such a feeling could not grow into
child tyranny and tyranny over parents;
- Начиная с самого раннего age, мальчику надо давать понять,
that any started business must always be completed;
- Boy must do sport. Sport gives a lot:
develops physical endurance and agility, increases
self-discipline and what is commonly called the “feeling of elbow”
(especially in team sports) teaches to experience with dignity
defeat and not gloat over the defeated enemy;
- One of the main advantages of a real man is feeling
responsibility for people who are close to him, as well as for
the thing he does. Этому чувству ребенка
must be taught from an early age. Otherwise – in return will appear
children’s egoism, which then grows into adult egoism;
- Еще одно чувство, которому необходимо научить ребенка с
the youngest age is mercy. This is a very necessary feeling for
forming a real male character: it includes
love, compassion, the desire to help another person and much
From general rules to specific rules
1) Сыну нужно давать как
possible more freedom. At the same time you need to understand: freedom –
this is not permissiveness. Any reasonable restrictions always
must attend. It is bad when such restrictions outgrow
almost total ban.
Phrase like “Do not run fast – you will break your knee”, “Do not fit –
you will fall “,” Do not touch – you will be wounded “,” Do not do – ourselves “and the
like a boy should hear as little as possible. Upbringing
excessive diligence, accuracy, caution, prudence
will almost certainly lead to a distortion of his masculine nature. He will
growing uncertain, afraid of everything, he may develop nervous
disease, stuttering, allergies, it can often hurt. Brought up
in the spirit of “no,” the boy is not able to stand up for the weak or
girl, repel the offender. He will be difficult to overcome
difficulties and strive to achieve any reasonable goals,
i.e., he will grow up not a real one, but an infantile man.
2) У мальчика должен быть положительный
an example to imitate. Starting with a three year old
age, by virtue of its nature, the boy moves away from his mother and
trying to get close with the men who surround him. When
child is six years old, to communicate with men becomes for
him by necessity. At this age, he seeks to imitate
men, trying to repeat their words, imitate their behavior, etc.
The best example to follow is the father. Therefore, dad should
spend as much time with your son as possible.
But modern realities are such that dads with a baby are often nearby
There is no and can not be due to the fact that the child grows in incomplete
family. In this case, the mother should try to at least her son
occasionally could communicate with some other man: grandfather, uncle,
some other relative. Or, alternatively, give your little son in
circle or sports section, where the coach is a man. Try
to acquaint the child with a “foreign uncle” for obvious reasons
Alternatively, you can replace a real man with a fictional one. For
This child psychologists are advised to find a book or film
character with true male qualities. And even better –
bravely fought on the front or heroically working grandfather
or another relative. Hanging his portrait on the wall, mom needs
as often as possible to talk about this character or grandfather,
discuss with his son his actions, unobtrusively comparing these actions
with the actions of his son. Willfully or involuntarily the boy will compare
yourself and your actions with the actions of a book character or
heroic grandfather that will help him to form the true
3) For воспитания настоящего men
need a favorable family atmosphere. Every child
needs to have mutual understanding, love, respect in the family,
harmony. Imaginary or true severity of a father towards a son
must be within reason. The father, as well as the mother, must
be gentle to your son. By this he does not spoil the child, but, on the contrary,
will help him grow loving, sensitive, not complexed,
able to show sympathy.
4) Boy must не бояться выражать
what he feels. An open expression of feelings is
very important for the formation of character. If the boy wanted
плакать – пусть он поплачет, и не надо его упрекать в том, что
this is “not a man.” On the contrary, it is necessary to understand: so the child
makes it clear that he is bad. Sympathy, Consolation and Joint
Attempts to understand the causes of crying are much better than
ridicule and reproaches.
The same is true of the joy the child shows.
To dismiss children’s laughter, or not to pay at all
attention is unreasonable. On the contrary, it is necessary to share joy with the son,
realizing that, most likely, he is proud of his first male
success and victories. Joint joy about this will instill in
boy self-confidence that is important for the formation of
real male character.
5) Не надо бояться открыто признавать
own mistakes. The ability to say to yourself “I’m wrong” and
apologize for being wrong is another important male trait
character Mom and dad should not fear that the open and
sincere recognition of them wrong in front of his son will hurt him and drop him
in sons’ eyes their parental authority. On the contrary, it is to him in
will help a lot: seeing that parents are sincere and ready to
ask for forgiveness, the son, taking from them an example, will also grow
able to realize their mistakes and ask for their forgiveness.
6) Boy must научиться
empathy. Help parents or friends give way
an old woman seat on the bus, feed the birds or the stray kitten –
These are all primary signs of empathy and compassion. Role
parents in this case is extremely important. Need to explain
baby, that this is nothing special and so he should do
always, because it is the actions of a real man.
7) Upbringing в мальчике храбрости и
courage These properties of character baby should learn with
very early childhood. To protect the weak, not to be afraid of the strong,
not to be afraid of the dark, to bear the pain courageously – all this
manifestations of boyish courage, from which later
real male courage and bravery will be formed. It does not follow
make tragedies from the fact that sometimes your son returns home with
broken nose: a fight for a boy is a very important element
self-education, it is she who forms strength and courage in him.
The duty of the parents (especially the father) is to find out the reasons
fights, and if the son fought for a just cause, praise him, explaining
at the same time, it is better that next time you try to do without
It should instill in the boy feeling
beautiful This feeling is extremely necessary for the present.
man, otherwise he can grow into a “one-sided” creature with strong
muscles, but flawed soul. We must strive to ensure that
early childhood, the boy could distinguish the beautiful from the ugly – like
around yourself, so in your own soul. By learning these differences, he
then grow up a man capable of appreciating the beauty of nature,
pictures, women, music, etc.
We also read: Withвивка хорошим вкусом: как
from birth develop a sense of beauty in a child
9) Необходимо учить ребенка
handle the technique. Considering that in modern life
technique plays a very important role, a real man should in it
to understand. It is clear that require some particularly deep
knowledge in the computer, washing machine or car from the child
does not follow, but elementary knowledge in this area is necessary.
Here, again, a very important example of the Pope, who should as much as possible
more often with his son to repair broken household appliances
and technique, simultaneously explaining what and how they are arranged.
10) Ребенок должен получать
right sex education. It is also very important.
condition of formation of the future of man. First of all, boy
it is necessary to teach proper hygiene: of course, it will be better if
father will teach this child. The next parent task is
explain to the son that he is a man, and girls is the opposite
Moreover, general explanations are not enough here. Extremely important
teach the boy to behave properly with the representatives
the opposite sex – girls. From 10-12 years old, for boys
need to know general information about what is sex and childbirth.
In addition, they should be told about those changes in the intimate
plans that happen to them and explain what it is –
the natural process and the stage of maturation of every man.
It is clear that this is not all the requirements for education
boys Someone can add their own requirements and rules
which should also encourage the boy to grow up
Features of education of the boy from birth to adolescence
- From birth to 3 years. Before baby
will be three years old, its gender does not matter. And boy,
and the girl is raised almost the same. During this period, baby more
is with mom than with dad. The mother feeds the child, cares for
it ensures its comfort and safety. The first words and the first
footsteps boy and girl pronounce and do the same.
- From 3 to 4 years. С трехлетнего age дети
able to distinguish dad from mom, uncle from aunts – that is, they can
различать всех, кто их окружает, по признакам floor. Here to parents
you need to pay specific attention to your son – that is,
to cultivate such masculine qualities in him as strength, endurance,
dexterity, courage. The boy can still play like a boy
and “girlish” toys. It does not follow этого опасаться: это ни
which way will not affect the formation of his male
- From 5 to 7 years. This age period is not less than
different from the previous one. Still the main thing for the baby
(regardless of whether he is a boy or a girl) is the parent
care, tenderness and caress. Although from time to time the boy needs
to remind that he is a boy, not a girl. With this
reminder the boy begins to realize himself as a representative
male, and by the age of seven is usually estranged
plan from the mother and gets closer to the father.
- From 8 to 10 years. Usually at this age
boy finally formed the belief that he is a representative
male floor. Parents here have a special role. They have to
try to keep the same between them and their son
trusting relationship that is very useful when the son becomes
as a teenager. Closer to 10 years old the boy may show aggression,
be rude to parents and act against them. Not be afraid of it
follows: in this way the son manifests instinctive signs
men – defending their own opinions and their territory.
- Adolescence. Raising a son
adolescence is purposeful inculcating in him many
basic male qualities: responsibility for their words and deeds,
truthfulness, courage, etc. The role of parents still has
of no small importance, however at the same time the teenage son is already
seeks to break out of parental care, spending a long
time with peers and friends. It was during adolescence
boys usually manifest those qualities that were laid in
him before. Therefore, it is important to bring up a boy in the present
a man from a very young age.
Typical mistakes in raising a boy
Of course, in such a difficult matter, as education in the boy qualities
a real man, no mistakes can be done. Do not be afraid of this:
errors need to be known in order not to repeat them later. Here is
List of common parental errors:
- The manifestation of excessive severity: parents believe that it is
in this way they can bring up masculinity in their son. Such
pedagogical approach can lead to the fact that the child closes,
will become aggressive or begin to lie. In addition, he can
develop disorders of the nervous system (tics, convulsions, stuttering,
- Fitting a child under a certain fictional “ideal” without taking into account
this is its individual characteristics;
- Indulging in the whims and selfish inclinations of the kid, in
the result is that not true male
qualities, and selfishness and infantilism;
- Inconsistency, or, in other words, reproaches and praise for
doing the same thing. By doing so, parents
contribute to the fact that their son will no longer distinguish what is good, but
what is bad, what is right and what is wrong;
- Frequent parental quarrels in the presence of a son;
- Inconsistent parental behavior, expressed in the fact that
one of them forbids everything to the child, and the other, on the contrary, is too
- Frequent criticism of the son and his comparison with other children not in
- Imposing negative attitudes like “You have nothing
work out, ”“ You don’t know how to do anything, ”“ You won’t be friends with you
one girl “, etc. As a result, the child can believe it and
stop intellectually, physically and spiritually evolve;
- Ignoring the role of physical education and over-emphasis
on science. The most correct approach in this case is reasonable.
alternation of both. Strength and endurance – not the most
the last qualities of a male personality.
We also read: 7 вредных советов по
raising a boy
Of course, after adolescence, life is not
is ending. The boy becomes a young man. However nurture
the boy and the upbringing of a young man are in many ways two different
We also read:
- We bring up the son. Father’s allowance
- Top 10 instructions that father must pass to his son
- How not to raise a mama’s son
Совет от Павла Ракова: Как из мальчика воспитать
a real man