Об умении говорить своему to kid твердое «Нет»
Good child psychologists and qualified teachers say,
because our world is not so safe as to
позволять to kid делать в нем все, что он захочет
или потакать to all детским прихотям. But many parents
they often don’t know how to say “No” to their baby, and
Represent how to refuse a child in his requests. how
to introduce the rules of prohibition correctly and not to create feelings in the child,
that it is in some way infringed upon and disliked? BUT главное – как научить
ребенка верно реагировать на слово «НЕТ»? About this we would like
talk in our article.
The content of the article
- 1 Why is it difficult to refuse your child?
- 1.1 What will the atmosphere of indulging a child in the family?
- 2 How to learn to refuse correctly?
- 2.1 How to tell a child NO. Few simple
советов, who work!
- 2.2 How to refuse a child to buy another toy?
- 2.1 How to tell a child NO. Few simple
- 3 How to say no to a child
- 4 how нужно говорить «нет» непослушному ребёнку? – Doctor
The most important thing parents should realize is to refuse the child not
means to offend him or humiliate him, as many mistakenly believe.
Столкнуться с твердым «Нет» for children придется не раз во взрослой
life, and it is better that this is taught by loving and beloved parents, and
not indifferent uncles and aunts. A child who understands and knows how to accept
failure will be more comfortable and easier to rotate in society than
spoiled peer. And it will be much easier for parents themselves.
contact with adequately responding to the failure of the baby.
Why is it difficult to refuse your child?
- The desire to please absolutely
Most often, this reason is based on a justifiable desire.
give a son or daughter something that the parents themselves were deprived of as a child
или родители испытывают жалость к ребёнку и пытаются угодить
his. У некоторых мам и пап стремление, чтобы ребенок был
no worse than others, and sometimes better than all, becomes obsessive
It is important to understand that the more you give a person, even
small, the more he begins to be required. The child gets used,
that all his desires are fulfilled, and with each fulfilled his
desire becomes more insistent and capricious. And parents with his
perseverance becomes more and more difficult to fight. AT
reality, the child needs a minimum of material values:
comfort, food, toys. Much more he needs spiritual:
intellectual and physical activity, safety, development
social skills, trusting interaction and collaboration
with adults. That is why the only way out is to carefully weigh
the need for a particular desire of the baby and refuse
- Feeling of shame in front of others, addiction
from someone else’s opinion
As an example можно привести ситуацию, когда мальчуган
riding hysterically on the floor of the store in response to disagreement
purchase a new toy. People turn around, start.
whisper, give advice. Some may even start
�“Threaten” your child, saying that they will take away themselves
naughty child. Such attention will definitely be unpleasant.
parents, they will be embarrassed, and many choose the simplest method
problem solving – in order not to blush at his own kolinochka,
go with her on occasion. But do not lose sight of the fact that children are very
quickly grasp what situations it is easier for them to get agreement from
parents, for example, with large crowds. Then kids
begin to “work in public” and parents have even more
�”Blush for them.” Groping for a weak spot, they will put pressure on him with
enviable regularity and thus perfectly manipulated
by adults. ATыход – решить, что для вас важнее, чужое мнение или
happy future for your child.
We also read: истерика в магазине — как
- Syndrome “one-time” requests
Sometimes parents don’t even think about whether
the need to fulfill a particular request of the baby. Special,
if he utters the magic phrase “Only once.” Think it over
absolutely the same desires do not happen. AT следующие много раз вам
will have to agree on similar requests and motivated they will be those
same “one time”. This will become the norm for the child. Refusing him
subsequently, you will receive in return a well-deserved aggressive reaction and
out of mind bad behavior. Do not settle thoughtlessly on any
weigh the pros and cons in your mind and accept the reasonable
- Distorted love feeling
is heо же жалость, оно же потакание. This reason is closely related to
first: the desire of all the best for the child. Refuse by
moms and dads – it means to deprive, not understand, offend feelings
little man Spend a clear gradation between the imaginary
love and sincere. A man who grew up in love and a man who grew up
in an atmosphere of constant indulgence is radically different
personality. Do you want to grow out capriciously aggressive in
relationship, dissatisfied life egoist and loser?
Children who grew up in an atmosphere of parental love and children,
who grew up in an atmosphere of parental indulgence are different
people, first of all, in relation to other people.
What will the atmosphere of indulging a child in the family?
When parents do not deny the child anything, they teach him
the most not to reckon with someone’s opinion, except his own. Have a young
man quickly formed the habit of getting everything he wants.
Over time, it is fixed and becomes second nature. In
adult life this will lead to a lot of problems and obstacles in
interaction with people.
Imagine if an employee of the passport office is unreasonable.
will refuse to accept your documents for the issuance of a new passport in return
overdue? You will be outraged to the core and throw yourself.
prove your rights and his duties to a civil servant who you
refused. And all because you have a clear look at what
that every person should have a passport and in a few years
must replace this document. Will be similar
come and matured child, but solely through your fault. is he
will be beside herself with rage and indignation every time she faces
with failure. After all, he used to always meet the consent and assistance in
performance of any whims.
To relieve an adult from the habits grafted with young nails
almost impossible. Just imagine how painful he will be.
live every day, filled with everyday for the rest
failures. For him, they will be a huge disappointment. Each
contact with people will be not just a meeting, but a difficult ordeal. BUT
he himself will be for others a burden and just an unpleasant person,
from which you want to get rid of as soon as possible. Most children with
time change, faced with the realities of the harsh life, but
This process is long and unpleasant. For example, only to the second or
a third marriage a person can understand that it is impossible to demand
the spouse of everything and always, but you also need to give something yourself and go to
compromise. Do you wish your child such a fate?
Show your vision and teach your baby while it is still possible.
the art of failure. Remember that in adult life may not be
people willing to sacrifice themselves for your offspring.
How to learn to refuse correctly?
If you find reasons to indulge a child, and accepted
the decision to deal with them, then you need to start with a constant
self control. Gently but surely stop the slightest unreasonable
requirements, no matter how much I want to do differently. You must
maintain awareness of the dangers of the wrong
parental behavior, and the idea of how painful and hard
will be a child in the future.
So what is it all the same, the correct failure? As an example
You can bring the following situation. Mother and son go to
supermarket shopping. At the entrance, the mother consults with the child,
Which cart is better to choose: bigger or smaller? Inзможно ту,
what’s on wheels to make it easier to transport heavy
products? Son advises on wheels, mom approves of his decision and
agrees. In the process of shopping a woman interacts with the child,
talks with him, comments on the purchased goods, talking about
how useful they are and how useful they are. Boy feels
on a par with an adult, trusts him. Then they pass by
refrigerator with ice cream, and the boy rushes to him with a view
put a couple in the cart. Mom refuses – “Now we will not
buy ice cream because it hurt just a couple of days ago
throat. As soon as you get better finally, we will definitely buy
the most delicious and beautiful ice cream, but if you buy it now, then
you can catch a cold again. Let’s better buy now instead
fruits. Will you help me choose the most delicious? ”
This is the correct failure. The child takes part in the selection
тележки, самостоятельно выбирает fruits. His opinion is taken into account and
embodied, and the refusal is justified: not just the categorical “No” without
explanation of the reasons, and a detailed explanation.
When the parenting process is started and the child responds to the rejection
throws a tantrum, you need to learn to be firm and at the same time
time to distract the baby, talk to him, explain the situation more
in detail, offer a compromise solution.
If you are frightened by the opinions of others who see the beating in
hysterical child, then analyze the situation and make a decision,
what is more important to you – the opinion of others or the performance of the parent
We also read: 6 советов как избежать
baby tantrums at the grocery store
How to tell a child NO. A few simple tips
How to refuse a child to buy another toy?
From the very tender age should teach the baby to the fact that not
Every toy he likes will be instantly purchased. Than
the sooner you teach this, the less problems
come across at a later age.
Toys must be purchased by necessity, thoughtfully, and not
just because the child wanted. He will want everything and always.
The best option is to buy toys on holidays / on occasion
some events to highlight the significance dates either for the purpose of
practical application. For example, in the winter – skis, skates and
board games, in the summer – an inflatable circle for a pool, badminton or
The process of buying and owning a thing is delivered to some children.
pleasure. BUT затем игрушка быстро становится неинтересной и
gathering dust on the shelf. Это связано с тем, что многие children, сами того не
Aware of self-affirming in the process of obtaining the desired toys.
is heи подчеркивают свое «Я» и совершенствуют навыки манипулирования
Even if the moment is missed, and everything described above is already happening in
Your family, in small steps, move to change. Gradually
teach your son to understand that not everyone you like
he will be bought a machine or a doll. Over time, the child will accept it.
and will cease to react painfully and violently to your refusal. One more
unpleasant nuance situation – if no restrictions on the purchase
no toys, the baby will be sure that the parents always
there is money at his whim. This will lead to a distorted formation.
concepts of material values.
We also read: how правильно отказать
baby in the purchase – 9 tips
Sometimes you want to cause your own little man,
but it is important to control yourself. Don’t miss out on important ones.
moments that negatively comes back in the future. If you understand
that they are not asking for you, but demanding, sound the alarm. Do not be afraid
refuse. The first time can be difficult, the second time will be
easier, then begin the formation of a new good habit. BUT
it is best not to bring to such difficult situations and learn
speak to the child “No” from an early age.
We also read:
- 5 rules by which you learn to say “no” to your
- 5 alternatives to tell the child “NO”
- How to learn to prohibit a child without forbidding?
How to say no to a child
How to refuse a child. Secrets from a child psychologist. how
refers to hysterics. The impact of crying on the child’s psyche and early