Comfortable baby. Does obedience always meanOK?

In everyday psychology there is such an interesting concept:
comfortable baby. It’s nice to deal with these children to all adults.
They always come at the first call, follow the instructions of the parents,
teachers and doctors, do not indulge, do not be capricious. In general, not children
but real angels. What will happen when a comfortable baby
mature? Does obedience always benefit children?

Удобный ребенок

Opinion of parents

Елена, мама 6-летней девочки: «Вчера кто-то
called Alice “obedient” and said it was very convenient. but
for some reason it upset me more than pleased. And me and my husband
not too love the word “obedience” in relation to children. He him
breathes something wrong. As if the child should not even
obey, and obey, regardless of whether the parents are right or

I prefer to say “good behavior.” It means that
the child understands how to behave. Obedience same in my
opinion indicates “blind acceptance.” I think many of you do not
agree with me, but for some reason that’s how I feel the word

We want our Alice:

  • listened to someone else’s opinion, but had her own;
  • understood the difference between right and wrong;
  • grew up confident but not arrogant person;
  • could tell us when we are wrong, because parents are not
    supermen and sometimes wrong;
  • had the courage to speak out against injustice;
  • respected others regardless of age;
  • could question …

… and I hope that we are mature enough to cope with
questions of Alice (and critics) and lead her on, on the right
of the way. Let it not even be very convenient. “

Why comfortable kids is bad?

As a rule, every child at the age of one year is active,
playful and extremely inquisitive. He tries to look at everything and
feel, try everything and go everywhere. Parents such a baby
delivers a lot of inconvenience: it is necessary to follow him, to protect him from
hazards. It is much easier to make him obedient, very calm and
manageable – in general, convenient in all respects. And all this
occurs to the detriment of the little mischief-maker.


We read also: как обезопасить дом от

Have you met such children who go to the store and
the room will be cleaned, and then quietly and calmly sit at home, not doing
nothing special? What do you say, always do. But such
the child wants to please not only mom and dad, the caregiver or
teacher, but also to all who are older or stronger than him. Including those
children who agree to recognize him as their own under one condition – he
must smoke, drink alcohol, steal and mock
more weak.

And such former comfortable children grow up and become the same
comfortable husbands and wives seeking to fulfill any desire
spouse and cast aside their own needs and thoughts. Agree
not everyone will like this compromise.

We read
 как правильно
поощрять baby?

What to do?

  1. Научите baby формулировать собственную
    Try to be more interested in his opinion about
    or other event, deed, person, about your family rules and
    traditions. Create a safe environment for him, explain
    baby, that will accept any of his answer. That’s when he can
    speak out frankly without fear of consequences with your
  2. Explain that every act has
    If you teach a child some skill, do not
    do it for yourself. It is necessary that he understood: it is important to be careful
    because it is useful to him in life. Explain what are the main
    benefits of order. If the baby doesn’t want to take away the toys,
    let him feel the consequences of the decision on itself.
    For example, he will be ashamed when guests unexpectedly descend upon you,
    or he cannot find the thing he needs in such a mess.
  3. Take a look at yourself. Comfortable baby often
    growing at the same convenient parents. Before raising in children
    independence and independence ask yourself: are you capable
    refuse to fulfill someone’s requirement that goes with yours
    by desires? How often do you do your own interests for the sake of
    good relations with other people? If this happens to you
    constantly try to be “uncomfortable.” Just by learning
    independence, you can cultivate this quality in your

We read also: 12 признаков избалованного

Calm, trouble-free children – this is a real mother’s
joy. They do not bring parents unnecessary problems, and, most importantly, they
so comfortable. Гораздо сложнее, когда у маленького baby есть
own desires and their own particular point of view. But exactly
this is necessary for a happy adulthood. And you want to see
is your baby happy or comfortable?

We read

  • 10 секретов воспитания послушного baby: как научить детей
    respect and hear parents
  • 5 problems of obedient children

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