Parental fatigue, views on parenting, and sometimes
the behavior of the child leads to the fact that mom or dad often
get annoyed at the child, break down at the cry, are angry. Of course parents
it does not cease to love, but in fact children more often hear
negative words to your address. Meanwhile, the atmosphere is calm
love is vital for the child to develop and mature. Only
Feeling parental acceptance and love, the child can stand firmly
on their feet and boldly walk through life. To create the necessary atmosphere
for parenting, parents often have to work in
first of all on yourself. It is hard work, but its fruits
will surpass all expectations. If you already embark on this path, advice,
the ones below will be very helpful.
- Do not shift responsibility for your child
reactions and behavior. Sometimes from the powerlessness of the parents themselves
occupy a childish position, shifting responsibility to the child
for your own actions: “Well, what should I do with you: spank or
put the corner? “,” Do you want me to scold you more? “.
A child cannot decide how his parents bring him up, punish him
and act in one way or another. This is the task of adults.
- Take responsibility for your actions on
yourself Not a child is angry and annoying, but you are angry and
get annoyed when he does something. Adoption ответственности
for their reactions make it possible to manage them, because it is impossible
change what you are not responsible for.
- Analyze your behavior. AT процессе этого
You will be able to see the trigger mechanism for your reactions to actions
child and realize that in fact takes you out
- Do not bring yourself to overwork. Resource
parental forces need constant replenishment, therefore not
put yourself and your needs in the background. Sleep right
food, physical activity, hobbies and hobbies give positive
emotions and fill forces for a calm education.
- Avoid rush and hard planning
of life. Very often we are angry with children for what they
too slow or their behavior violates our plans. If a
take your time and let the events just happen in your
life problems will be much less.
- Formulate your requirements correctly. For children
It is very difficult to perceive the requirements of adults, because they
formulated in the “adult” language. Often adults formulate
your requirements in a “negative” way: “do not go,” “do not touch”, “do not
come near. ” The child needs not so much prohibitive signals,
how many in specific instructions: “Take your hand off the dog and come to
- Learn to leave your problems beyond the children’s threshold.
rooms Children perfectly “read” the emotional state
adults. If a «взвинчены» и погружены в мысли о проблемах на
work, financial difficulties, conflicts with relatives, child
be sure to “catch” your nervousness and behave
appropriate. Since birth, the rule is unwavering:
�”Calm mom – calm baby.”
- Do not demand from the child that you do not know how.
yourself. Agree, absurd in a rage to shout at the weeping
child: “Immediately calm down!”. If a вы сами не можете совладать
with your emotions, a child, looking at you, never learns
handle your own.
- ATоспитывая ребёнка в любви и calm, вы делаете
good not only to him, but also to himself, “growing up” within himself the wise,
calm, loving parent.
- If a вам кажется, что ребёнок провоцирует вас,
stop and think: what does this one really want now
little defenseless man? AT большинстве случаев за
provocative behavior is worth the desperate thirst for attention and
- Control what and how you tell your
children ATысказывать критику детям нужно правильно:
first, it must be “I-statements”; secondly criticize
you need not the child himself, but his concrete actions. For example,
instead of “You make me angry,” it’s better to say “I’m angry when you …”.
- Be open to new experiences and knowledge. Not
Only children learn from their parents, but so can parents
learn from children.
- The best parental position is the bossy one
care. Such a position requires strength, self-confidence and
personal maturity. But it is from this position that education can
occur without screams and irritations. Baby just happens
because you are an adult whom he trusts and whose authority
- Not стесняйтесь обращаться за поддержкой к более опытным
parents whose example is indicative of you
specialists and books. Sometimes through books and conversations
You can see your mistakes and draw conclusions.
- Not ждите от себя мгновенных результатов.
Working on yourself and developing new habits takes time.
Celebrate every step towards your goal, praise yourself for the slightest
success If a сегодня вы злились и раздражались на ребёнка меньше,
what yesterday is good.
- Not ищите специальных поводов для того, чтобы сказать
child about your love and be sure to support the physical
contact with hugs, touches, kisses.
- Believe in your child and his good
intentions. Nature is laid so that children always
strive to be good for their parents, to please them, just
the child is not always able to appreciate what is really appropriate and
well, and that – not very. Your task is to teach him this.
- Shift the focus of your actions from “dog training” to
relationship with the child. Parenting is, first of all,
reliable and close relationships, not a system of prohibitions and punishments.
If in a relationship with a child there are no problems – it’s easy to bring up in
love and peace, because he himself wants to be like you,
- Do not confuse love for a child with
permissiveness. The child just needs to know the boundaries
what is permitted, for him it is the foothold in the outside world and the basis
his life principles and guidelines.
- Barring anything and restricting a child, do it from
positions of domineering care. If there are any rules, then
they must always be respected in principle. And each child
once you need to explain why you forbid something to him: “I do not want
make you sick, ”“ I want you to have healthy eyes. ”
- Let the child show any emotion and be in any
mood, sad, naughty, crying. Adoption
any behavior of the child, not just exemplary, –
The best proof of your love.
- Drop all expectations about the child and not
compare it with other children. Child deserves
love simply because it is, and not for success and achievement.
- Be always on the side of the child, especially when someone
the third criticizes the child or teaches it. Situation when
mom or dad from the desire to “please” a stranger are combined with
they are “against” the child and begin to shame or teach him, very
traumatic. As a child, it is perceived as a betrayal that
very undermines trust in relationships.
- Do not be afraid to praise the child. Long time in
Our culture believed that a child should not be praised – it is possible
pamper this. In fact, words of praise for a child are powerful.
the motivation to become better and make parents happy. AT
otherwise, what’s the point of being good if he’s small
Nobody notices the victory? Also, praise can be encouraged
behavior, but then you need to praise correctly. Not automatic
�”Well done”, and explaining in detail to the child that you liked how he
did something or behaved in some situation. We read tips
психолога как правильно поощрять детей
- Forgive yourself for your “nonideality” and remember that
everyone has the right to make mistakes. Being a parent nowhere
teach, so your motherhood or fatherhood – solid
improvisation. But even if you were wrong about something, most
pedagogical blunders can be corrected and it is better to concentrate
on this one.
Next, your child should not annoy you! – read article
- ATоспитание ребенка до года: советы родителям;
- 10 tips on how to stop shouting at your children;
- 10 mistakes of parents in the upbringing of children;
- How to tell a child “NOT” and “NO”;
- ATопрос от мамочек: «Что мне делать, если я постоянно кричу на
your child? ”
ATоспитание ребёнка – очень сложный процесс. The child is raised
not only parents, but also the very atmosphere that prevails in the house,
other family members, kindergarten, school. But precisely parents –
The main people in the life of a child. Parental love makes him
strong, resilient, able to succeed and to cope with
any difficulties. Work on yourself, change unsuccessful models
nurture more effective, gain parental wisdom and
bring up the child in peace and love!