Every parent has come across this unpleasant
phenomenon – child hysteria. Someone prefers to ignore
children’s whims, others get annoyed and loudly chastise
screaming child. But child psychologists are asking parents to be
be careful: there are two types of children’s tantrums, each of which
requires a radically different parental response. And it is important to be able to
Hysterics of the upper brain (upper floor)
This type of children’s hysteria is caused by momentary emotions,
strong discontent or desire to immediately get yours.
In other words, this is the most unpleasant situation when your
the child suddenly gets up in the middle of the store, shouting and stamping with his feet,
insistently demanding to buy him a new doll or a radio-controlled
typewriter. This tantrum is a banal attempt to manipulate the parent.
in order to achieve the desired. It occurs in the upper brain and
fully controlled by the child himself.
Читаем подробно: детская истерика в
the store – how to respond to parents
In such a tantrum, the child completely controls himself,
perfectly aware of what is happening around, because the cause
the occurrence of a tantrum of the upper floor serves his own
the decision to arrange it. Even if the parent does not
it seems, but in this situation his child is perfectly adequate. it
easy to check: buy the child the desired toy, and for a split second
he will be calm again, and his mood will return to full
The tantrum of the upper floor is a kind of moral terrorism,
for the resolution of which there are only two ways:
- Agree and give the child what he requires.
- Ignore the tantrum so that the child understands – his performance is not
Psychologists advise calm attitude to children’s tantrums
of this kind. Keep your composure stay
cold-blooded. Do not go on about the child so that he does not
used in the future such a “dirty reception” for easy and
achieve your goals unconditionally. Explain in a calm tone
him that at the moment you cannot fulfill his wish.
Make a strong case, tell me why you refuse,
например, покупать новую typewriter. The child must learn that for
the fulfillment of his momentary desire now is corny
opportunities. And that you don’t just refuse him to insist on
The child will almost certainly calm down quickly if you will
act as follows:
- Explain to him that you understand his wishes perfectly.
- Give reasonable reasons for refusing.
- Underline his abnormal behavior and promise
- Offer a deal: you buy a typewriter or doll for your child, like
only this will be possible.
�”This doll is really very beautiful and I understand perfectly
why do you want her so much But now we don’t have any
money, we can not buy it today. You behave very much
ugly, i’m ashamed of you. If you do not calm down, then I
will have to punish you, and then this weekend you will not go to
circus. If you calm down and realize that now you are behaving terribly,
then we will buy you a doll as soon as we have it
Читаем также: Что нельзя делать родителям,
when a child behaves unbearably?
If your child, even despite all your logical reasons and
calm tone, continues to run amok and demand his
Be sure to fulfill the promised punishment. And bring it to him
the important thought is that now he will never get what he wants. AND
it’s all his fault!
The child must realize that not all his wishes are required
instantly come to life, but if he is patient and learns
behave adequately, then in the end will get what so
Читаем также: 10 причин плохого поведения
ANDстерика нижнего мозга (нижнего этажа)
Unlike the first type of hysteria, the bottom floor tantrum is
a phenomenon generated by the temporary inadequacy of the child. Strong
negative emotions or experiences overwhelm him so much
strongly that he loses the ability to think reasonably or impute
parental words. itт тип истерики охватывает нижний отдел
brain, completely blocks the ability to self-control and blocks
access to the upper section.
The children’s tantrum of the lower floor resembles a state of affect,
when the upper part of the brain is simply turned off, but the thought
process is blocked. At this moment the child’s brain is functioning completely.
otherwise, and any of your words simply will not reach his
of consciousness. The only way to stop this type of hysteria is to remove
mental stress so the child can come faster
Читаем также: Почему ребенок бьется
head on the floor and walls – the causes and how to respond?
Scold a child, shame it or scream at a tantrum
lower floor is useless! The child will not be able to understand
It is important to help the child get out of this state of hysteria in order to
he could not hurt himself or inflict damage on anyone
serious harm. Remember that that baby is perfect now
inadequate! You can not ignore his state, leave one in
room or walk away with a detached view.
When any sound arguments and logic are powerless, then act
in a fundamentally different way:
- Take the child in your arms, hold him tight;
- Quietly and kindly address him, convince your child that
now everything is fine;
- It is better to carry the child away from the place where he started.
an attack of hysteria;
- Calm him tactilely: caressing strokes and gentle hugs
often very effective.
The priority is the need to return the child to
state of sound adequacy. AND лишь после того, как он полностью
came to his senses, you can already begin to lead a quiet dialogue. Not
shame the child and do not try to scold him, because hysterics
may repeat. The task of parents is to find out the reasons why
there was a flash of hysteria.
A child who has suffered a tantrum of the lower floor before
just needs comfort and parental caress!
�“You didn’t want so much to finish your lunch?” Notужели
porridge you did not like? ANDли ты уже был сыт и не хотел
eat up? Not нужно так расстраиваться, ты же мог просто сказать, что
already ate. Come on you will talk to us with dad when not anymore
If you want to eat, we will not force you. OK, we
A parent must understand that there is a significant difference between
when a child is hysterical because of his whims and when he is serious
depressed and upset. It’s hard for an adult to descend to the level
my child But sometimes a small child can really be strong
get upset because of a minor incident or little things, even
fall into a state of bitter melancholy. After baby
calm down and his upper brain can normally
to function, the parent should try to calmly talk to
a child, to cause a reciprocal dialogue, urging the child to speculate
�”Even if the food did not seem very tasty to you or if you
already ate, you should not behave that way. it очень
ugly! After all, I tried and cooked for you. Could you just
say I’m not hungry, I would not force you to eat. Notльзя
losing your temper if you just didn’t like something. ”
ANDменно в этот момент, когда ребенок предварительно был понят
you have received your share of comfort and sympathy, you can spend
sparing educational measures. The upper brain is no longer
blocked, hysteria behind, and the child becomes susceptible to
your words and instructions.
How to quickly recognize the right type of hysteria
Not всякий родитель обладает навыками тонкого психолога, так что
sometimes determine the type of child tantrum that unfolded before your eyes
it is very difficult. AND возникают сложности с выбором собственной
response. But one can discern tantrums by a number of nuances.
- You notice that the screaming child listens to you and understands;
- The child quickly calms down after threats of punishment;
- You can distract or speak a child, switch it
- It turns out to agree with the child;
- ANDстерика больше носит демонстративный характер.
- The child does not understand your words, he does not seem to hear you;
- He does not calm down even after you promised
to fulfill his desire;
- A child is trying to harm you or himself, seeking something
smash, hit someone;
- He cannot control his body, and if there is speech, then
she is incoherent;
- ANDстерика напоминает состояние аффекта.
Remember: sometimes even an adult is hard
to cope with their emotions, and for a small child this
it is often impossible at all.
Читаем также: Как бороться с детской
hysterical: advice from a psychologist
How to find out the causes of tantrums and be able to instantly warn
All parents periodically face the problem of children’s
hysteric – tears, screams, felting on the floor in public places
put moms and dads to a standstill. So that your life does not turn into
sheer nightmare, and your child stopped pursuing his
tears, psychologist Victoria Lyuborevich-Torkhova talks about
effective methods of dealing with children’s tantrums: